Thursday, June 26, 2008

Can't Get You Off My Mind

"I've got a pocket full of money
And a pocket full of keys that have no bounds
But then I think of loving
And I just cant get you off of my mind."
~Lenny Kravitz, "I Can't Get You Off My Mind"

You ever have one of those relationships... you know the one that stays with you forever? The one that defines the rest of your interactions with the opposite sex for the rest of your natural life? It boggles my mind that one person can affect you in so many ways. I have had both positive and negative relationships with men that has stayed with me over the years.

The negative first...
He was my first "adult" relationship. I was a freshman in college and infatuated with the star basketball player and the Kappa Alpha Psi Chapter President (simultaneously). He was the ex-teammate and close friend who laughed at my schoolgirl crushes. We hooked up and begun a relationship that was at best, turbulent. He cheated the entire time (with nothing but oogly girls) but still came home to me. Of course, it took me a good 5 months to find out. I stayed, out of love, but finally I had to leave. It is becasue of him, that I trust no man. He slept in the same bed with me for almost a year and still found the time and inclination to be with other females and felt he was doing nothing wrong. Apparently hurting my feelings and breaking my young heart was "nothing bad".

The positive...
He was the man that followed that disastrous relationship. Another friend, who went to a ddifferent college, but he was there for me through my heartbreak. I was attracted to him from day 1. I mean, who wouldn't be? He was chocolate brown, tall, dark, handsome and muscular. He was also sweet, caring, smart and insightful when needed. Amazing, huh? He was also 4 years older than I was and almost done with his Graduate Degree. I remember on one visit to see him, he introduced me to his friends, his teammates, and anyone we encountered. I was his "girlfriend" and the "love of his life". It seemed as if everyone knew about me. Apparently, he talked about me all the time. I smiled, laughed and blushed my way through the long weekend. Of course, there were the ones who came before me who still weren't ready to accept that he was no longer available. There were "confrontations" and he was by my side everytime. We eventually broke up a little while after he graduated, because I was still in school and partying was a way of life for me, and he was over the college life at that point. It broke my heart to let h im go. I think of him often. We are still friends, and catch up often. I tell peopel who knew us together, that he is my "Prototype". Everyone that came after him has been of the same mold, or close enough to it.

Negative and Positive... both were early on in my relationship history but still have a resounding effect in the way I view men in general. Which is the way it should be. I tell all my friends, that every relationship/situation/hook-up should be a learning experience. They should teach us not to make the same mistakes and what to look out for in a potential mate. My mistakes should not be your mistakes.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Midwest Flood Victims


Alexae Dunn pets her dog Lady while sitting on a car surrounded by flood waters near her home Monday, June 23 in South Shore, Missouri. Forecasters say the Mississippi River appears to have crested in the northern parts of Missouri and would by June 25 in southern parts of the state and in Illinois. (JOE RAEDLE, GETTY IMAGES)

Baby Crocodiles (CREEPY!)

Crocodile offspring, part of 190 hatched in captivity two weeks ago, remain in a pond at the crocodile farm inside the San Carlos Technological Institute in Santa Clara de San Carlos in Costa Rica. According to biologists, one of the objectives of the project is the conservation of this species which is in danger of extinction. (YURI CORTEZ, AFP/GETTY IMAGES)

Monday, June 23, 2008

Ex-Boyfriend Rant

What is it about exes? Why is it that they keep coming around when you don't want them to?

The relationship may have been over for like 2 months or 2 years, but still they pop up when you least expect them to, talking some mess like, "I just wanted to see how you were" or "Do you miss me?" or "You were on my mind, so I decided to call". I mean dammitalltohellwithgasolinedrawson! It's over, dead and gone with for a fricking reason. Either me or you walked away from the situation for any number of reasons, but you still feel the need to call/show up and bother me.

I had my ex-boyfriend from freshman year call me 4 years later talking bout "I miss you and I realize that you were the best thing that happened to me". Umm okay! You left me for some random bitch that you met at a party, had a kid with her, bought a house with her... but I was the best thing that happened to you? Of course I lit into his ass. Had to drop some knowledge on some things that he missed over the course of the 1+ years were together and made him realize that I was better off.

Another ex decided to hook up with a chick with my name and then play the "I've moved on" card after a couple of years. Hated to break it to him, but your new chick has my name, she looks like me and from the MySpace page she decided to harrass me from, she behaved/acted/thought just like me, cept she was very young-minded. Maybe I was being childish when i told him that the dude I left him for was everythingI was looking for in a man, everything he was not... but I had gotten to the point where enough was enough! I got tired of ranting emails from this young chick and him doing his best to butter me up with midnight phone calls/text messages about how "good we were together."

The one that really gets to me is the most recent. I spent 2+ years with this man who bounced back and forth between me and his BabyMomma. Yes, I was stupid in love to let it go that long without kicking his ass to the curb. Finally did it tho... He accepted my decision, wasn't happy about it, but he dealt with it and we became reluctant-friends. Then he drops the bombshell! He FINALLY left her and wants to pursue a relationship with me, for real this time. Hmmm... at first, in a moment of stupidity, I considered it. But then I thought about it for a lil bit and realized that I would never be truly happy. This man put me through hell and back and when I finally get to a point where I can say that I am close to being over him, he wants to come back into my life and my heart. Nah Buddy!

Why can't people learn to let past partners go? Someone I met once said that dudes never want to let the one who "stroked them the right way" go. I laughed when I heard that, but I do believe that everything happens for a reason. Every relationship/situation should be used as a learning experience so that the same mistakes aren't made in the future. But damn if the men I have dealt with don't seem to get that point until I get mean or real damned cruel with them. I hate hurting other people's feelings, but sometimes it just has to be done.

Oh well! I'm going to have to begin another one of those difficult, "please just leave me alone and let it go" type talks.

MeMe'd - Love and Affection

i'm gonna do this MEME thing that i saw over at "Two Ditzy Broads" http://twoditzybroads.blogspot.com/2008/06/memed-juicy.html

This is how this "Meme" test is about to go down.

1. Put your Music Player on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER WHAT!

After you’ve answered all of the questions, tag 3 other people and then let them know they’ve been tagged to do the MEME themselves!

-IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY” YOU SAY? Teenage Love Affair - Alicia Keys

-WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY? Love Is A Losing Game - Amy Winehouse (man, listen!)

-WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL? Lollipop - Lil Wayne ;)

-HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY? Id Rather Be With You - Bootsy Collins (so damned true!)

-WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE? Amnesia - Cherish

-WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO? Girls Around The World - Lloyd feat/ Lil Wayne (of course the opposite)

-WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU? Come With Me - Shai

-WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS? Hideaway - Tessanne Chin

-WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN? Player's Prayer - Lloyd

-WHAT IS 2+2? Dangerous - Kardinal Offishall feat/ Akon

-WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND? Waiting In Vain - Floetry (true, miss you!)

-WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE? You Know Me - 2 Pistols feat/ Ray J

-WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY? Rain - Razah

-WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP? Hurt Again - Mary J. Bloge (makes no damned sense)

-WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE? Bust It Baby - Plies feat/ NeYo (haha!)

-WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU? Missin' You - Trey Songz

-WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING? Closer - NeYo

-WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL? Take A Bow - Rihanna

-WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST? No Te Veo - Jowell y Randy feat/ Pitbull

-WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET? Eff Tha Otha Side - Dunk Ryders feat/ Trick Daddy

-WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS? Let Me Think About It - Ida Corr meets Fedde Le Grand

-WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS? Love And Affection - Pressure

Friday, June 20, 2008

Drunk Beyond All Reason

So it is Friday...

I remember one Friday, not to long ago. I was moving to a new position at my job and I had pretty much given up on working for the rest of the day. My simple ass decided to go have a few drinks during my break and not haven eaten anything since breakfast, I was a little toasted that afternoon. After work, I decided to go back to the bar with a group of friends and proceeded to drink almost $100 in liquor, by my damned self. Here is what I remember drinking:

at least 6 Lemon Drops
2 Blue Long Island Iced Teas
1 shot of Jagermeister
1 shot of something called Liquid Cocaine
at least 2 Tequila Sunrises
and of course, 2 shots of Patron Silver

Clearly, I was passed out drunk by 1:30am. Where was I you ask? I was in the bathroom. I was totally fine, until I sat down to pee. After waking up the next afternoon, I was informed that I was truly the life of the party. I danced with everyone, molested 2 friends of mine (1 male, 1 female), propositioned a few folks and at one point, decided that I was a stripper and proceeded to dance like I was one.

Honestly, I don't remember most of the night. The memories are fuzzy and I think that is only because people told me what I had been doing/saying. Luckily, I was with friends. They made sure that I wasn't around people who would take advantage of my inebriated state, and when I was finally down for the count, they got me out of there faster than the Road Runner could say “Meep, Meep”, to Wiley Coyote.

I made a promise to myself to never ever get that drunk again. I hated the feeling that I had lost 12 hours of my life and I had no idea what went on the night before. You know that things were out of control when the bartenders all know my name now.

Lesson learned: always drink amongst people you know, don't mix your liquors and always EAT SOMETHING!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Plans for my Future (in blogging at least)

So I'm beginning to think about the future. Well not "beginning" exactly. Just focusing more on what I want out of this life.
So in my moment of wisdom, I decided to blog more. Get some of these thoughts down and out of my head for everyone to see. Crazy, right? Anywho, so I am deciding how the blog should be set up, a kind of pattern if you may.

(Ranting Mondays)
Mondays will be my ranting day. The weekend is usually when I am at my nuttiest so all types of random shit crosses my mind. So I will be typing it all down to share.

(Picture of the Week Tuesdays)
This is when I will display a picture that I have fallen in love with over the past week. It may be funny, it may be serious, or just simply retarded. The first installment shows a picture of Hurricane Andrew right before the eye made landfall on August 24, 1992. I was not in Florida for Andrew's wrath, but close friends of mine were and some parts of Homestead, Florida have not recovered, still. Some pictures may have a personal significance, like the Andrew Picture.

(Hump Day Wednesdays)
Folks hear the word “hump” and they tend to think about sex. So I will try to discuss a sex-related topic on Wednesdays. If you are faint of heart and/or stomach, you may want to skip Wednesdays.

(Almost There Thursdays)
This is when the great day of Friday looms. So I will probably try to make that day fun and light-hearted. No serious talk unless something comes up that warrants it.

(Drunken Fridays)
the weekend is finally upon us, so the topic of the day will most likely be related to partying and drinking or just plain-ole debauchery :)

Weekends are me-time, so unless something major comes up, I won't be blogging.
Now let's see if I can stick to this plan.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Survey #1

1. How old will you be in five years?- 31 freaking years old; officially one year past the grown-up mark! i had better be on my shit by then...
2. Who did you spend at least two hours with today?- myself and my coworkers... work is fun ;)
3. How tall are you?- 5 feet even... i know cuz i measured
4. What do you look forward to most in the next six weeks?- moving the hell out of my apartment!
5. What's the last movie you saw?- The second Incredible Hulk movie
6. Who is the last person you called?- He who shall not be named
7. Who was the last person to call you?- my Momma
8. What was the last text message you received?- i have no idea. Sidekick got stolen and my cell phone is acting stupid
9. Do you prefer to call or text?- call some folks, text some folks
11. What were you doing at 12am last night?- being a dork and watching the episodes of Bones that i DVRed
12. Are your parents married/separated/divorced?- still married, unfortunately
13. When is the last time you saw your mum?- over the Christmas holidays
14. What color are your eyes?- brown
15. What time did you wake up today?- 9ish
16. What are you wearing right now?- a gray slacks and a black t-shirt
17. What's your favorite Christmas song?- i hate christmas music
18. Where is your favorite place to be?- in my bed
19. Where is your least favorite place to be?- at work
20. Where would you go if you could go anywhere?- anywhere with my Momma
21. Where do you think you'll be in 10 years?- i have no idea. hopefully still alive
22. Do you tan or burn?- i tan very easily...very easily, although i got burnt last weekend at the beach (weird!)
23. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?- Freddy Kruger
24. What was the last thing that made you laugh?- don't know. but whatever it was, it might not have been too funny. i laugh easily and often
25. How many TVs do you have in your house?- in my apartment, 1. wait...are you casing the joint?
26.How big is your bed?- none of your damned business
27. Do you have a laptop or desktop computer?- mind your own business
28. Do you sleep with or without clothes on?- again with the nosiness
29. What color are your sheets?- currently...baby blue
30. How many pillows do you sleep with?- 4
31. What is your favorite season?- ummmm summer. i live in Miami!
32. What do you like about autumn?- that it stays up north
33. What do you like about winter?- see #32
34. What do you like about the summer- it's year-round baby!
35. What do you like about spring?- see #32
37. What cities/towns have you lived in?- Georgetown, Guyana, South America; Brooklyn, New York; Sheffield, Massachusetts; Philadelphia, Pennsylvania; Lexington, Kentucky; Miami, Florida
38. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet?- bare feet (it's the Indian in me)
39. Are you a social person?- sometimes
40. What was the last thing you ate?- does coffee count?
41. What is your favorite restaurant?- prolly this Sushi/Thai place by the j-o-b
42. What is your favorite ice cream?- can't eat ice cream
43. What is your favorite dessert?- cake
44. What is your favorite kind of soup?- dahl and if that doesn't count... tomato basil
45. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich?- apple
46. Do you like Chinese food?- love it!
47. Do you like coffee?- it is my body's fuel!
48. How many glasses of water, a day, do you drink on average?- don't you mean bottles? i drink about 3-4
49. What do you drink in the morning?- coffee
50. Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?- with someone else, as long as they aren't touching me all the time... i like my space
51. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?- dead smack in the middle... taking up all the space
52. Do you know how to play poker?- yes... gambling is in my blood ;)
53. Do you like to cuddle?- sometimes, but refer to question #50... i like my space
54. Have you ever been to Canada?- it's my third home ;)
55. Do you have an addictive personality?- is that a way of asking if i am addicted to stuff? if so, then yes
56. Do you eat out or at home more often?- at home but mostly from a box. i'm simple that way
58. Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you?- nope... not a soul. i'm unique that way ;)
59. Do you want kids?- no sirree bob!
60. Do you speak any other languages?- i used to be pretty much fluent in French, but because i stopped speaking it in protest... it went bye-bye. i also speak Guyenese Creole/Patios
61. Have you ever gotten stitches?- i had stitches in my gums when i had my wisdom teeth replaced and i had staples in my leg when i had my ACL reconstructed
62. Have you ever ridden in an ambulance?- hahaha! plenty of times. i was one of those kids/adults...
63. Do you prefer an ocean or a pool?- neither... i don't like bodies of water
64. Do you prefer a window seat or an aisle seats?- aisle
65. Do you know how to drive stick?- heck naw... that requires too much concentration and i think i would move a little too fast on the roads
66. What is your favorite thing to spend money on?- shoes and food
67. Do you wear any jewelry 24/7?- well i used to wear my grandma's wedding ring and my diamond studs but they were stolen. so now i wear my replacement jewelry unless i'm in the bed or in the shower
68. What is your favorite TV show?- CSI
69. Can you roll your tongue?- ummm... stop being nasty
70. Who is the funniest person you know?- i'm thinking Ola-Mae cuz she thinks just like me
71. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?- a giant Pooh Bear
72. What is the main ring tone on your phone?- Reppin - Jim Jones (i'm odd)
73. Do you still have clothes from when you were little?- heck naw... we donate and pass stuff on in Guyana
WHAT IN THE HELL HAPPENED TO QUESTIONS # 74 - 84?
85. What was the last book you read?- don't know but it was prolly something murder related
88. Best phrase?--- - "how 'bout y'all kiss my ass?"
89.Who was the last person you texted?- don't know, Sidekick is gone
90.What pets do you own?- ummm i don't like animals
91.Have you ever been on a plane?- yes, but i don't like to fly
92. Who is in the picture frame closest to you?- Sophia and Vanessa
93. What was the last note you scribbled on a piece of paper?- something about my students, voicmail maybe
94. What is your favorite candle scent?- lavender
95. What is your favorite board game?- Cranium
96. Where do you attend church?- i don't. i am the Devil's Spawn according to certain folks...
97. What is the longest you have ever camped out in a tent?- not one stinking day
AGAIN WITH THE MISSING QUESTIONS...
100. Who was the last person to do something extra special for u?- "he who shall not be named" made me feel good about myself, like he always does when he's not being an ass!